Wedding Ceremony Ideas

I looked around at different wedding ceremony ideas.  No one wants their wedding ceremony to drag on and on, but after planning it for 2 years I didn't want it to be over in 5 minutes either.  I think a wedding ceremony has to walk that fine line of having meaning but not boring your guests.  

My first idea was the unity candle ceremony, but I wasn’t sure if I should do it.  Because although I’ve always loved candles, that seems religious, and I’m not sure it would be right to use them just because I think they’re pretty. 

So then I looked into the idea of a sand ceremony for my wedding.  Again, I do enjoy the beach.  And it would be really amazing to use sand from my hometown plus sand from England.  Have a piece of England right here in our home.  And the meaning of the sand ceremony is about a “blending,” and two lives becoming one. 

But then I saw another wedding ceremony sounded much more meaningful.  It seemed more like the start of a marital tradition to aid in getting through the tough times, and concretely demonstrating our love for each other throughout our marriage.  And that’s the rose ceremony. 

First of all, Adam’s favorite flower is a rose, and I like roses, so that works.  But that’s not all.  In the rose ceremony (please forget about The Bachelor/The Bachelorette connotations right now before you keep reading) the couple exchanges roses.  And the officiate explains that marriage is like that.  You constantly give to each other.  And even though it seems like this is just breaking even, the love makes the exchange more than, well, if we each just went out and bought a rose for ourselves, haha.  

It’s obviously more eloquent than that, but I really like that message.  That life will always be sweeter, everything we do is just so much better than being alone.  I always tell Adam how making lunch together is so much nicer than making it alone.  And now our whole life together will be better because it’s shared.

It goes on to say that after we have our first fight, and any fight we have after or any difficult time we’re going through, we should exchange roses.  That a rose will be a symbol of love and forgiveness and support from now on.  Anniversaries too, which is good because who wants just to associate roses only with fighting, haha.  But again, it’s that idea of maintaining a happy marriage.  It’s not just something that was done just on our wedding day.  It’s like a constant renewal.  I think that’s perfect.  :)

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Photo credits:

Trostel 

geishaboy500 

Richard Elzey  

Wilson Hui   

Wedding Processional Order: No Father of the Bride

For the processional, I wasn’t sure what we’d do about the traditional walking down the aisle two by two thing, since the numbers don’t really add up.  I know Adam and the best man will be there with the JP first.  There’s the best man and maid of honor (my sister) who go second to last.  But then there’s also his brother who’s a groomsman.  And his mom, whose husband won’t be able to attend.  And my mom.  And then lastly, well, of course, me.

Mom suggested that since my dad won’t be with us that I ask my brother to walk me down the aisle.  Which I was cool with.  I looked online for more information on the processional and learned that I’d need to walk on his left side because the right side is traditionally the sword hand, which he’d need free to defend me if someone tried to kidnap me on my wedding day.  (AWESOME.  Must look into having him carry a sword.  However, he’s left handed, so maybe this wouldn’t work…) I read somewhere that the whole “giving away the bride” thing was sexist and outdated, but I want a traditional (and possibly sword wielding) wedding and he’s a male family member, so I was happy.

But then I started thinking more about it.  He’s my BABY brother.  Nine years younger than me.  Plus I bought my own home a few years back.  I love him, but I am completely self-sufficient and have been for a while; why would HE “give me away?”  It really is kind of demeaning. 

Instead, I started thinking about the alternative.  I walk down the aisle by myself.  I think that sends a whole other message.  Not “poor fatherless girl.”  No, that was my choice, and I won’t be ashamed of it, I’ll be proud.  Walking down the aisle BY MYSELF.  Of my own volition.  To go marry the man I chose.  Let’s face it, the moment the bride walks down the aisle, that is supposed to be all about the bride.  The song played traditionally is “Here Comes the Bride,” not “The Bride is Being Given Away.”  My brother really doesn’t belong in the picture.  I think accepting all the attention instead of sharing it will be empowering. 

No, I think my brother can still have a role as an usher, seating my mom.  And I think that he’s the type that would laugh if I explained to him why I think I’ll walk alone.  Though he’ll be very sad to learn he was THIS close to carrying a sword. 

In Case of Rain. And Wind. And Heat Waves. And Bugs.

As I’ve said before, I really have my heart set on an outdoor summer wedding.  A bright sunny day with birds singing, seventy degree weather, greenery all around and a lake expanding outward is my idea of a dream setting for my wedding. 

But the more I daydream about a sunny wedding, the more disappointed I’ll be if it rains.  And even if we get a sunny day, there are LOTS of things that can go wrong outdoors.  What if it’s too hot?  What if there are bugs?  What if it’s super windy?

The best wedding planner in the world can’t make the sun shine for me.  I’m going to have to come up with a plan B.  Which is not easy when your plan A isn’t totally in place.  But when “not thinking about it” isn’t an option, all I can do is think about possibilities at this point that could make the day go a little better. 

Romantic Themed Umbrellas

That’s a no brainer.  But I found a really cute one!

This umbrella’s got nice weather built right in, hah.

Citronella Candles

I love candles, so this would keep the bugs away, hopefully.  I already have votive candle holders from HERE.  If I just switch out a couple normal candles for citronella (and tell the photographer to stay away from the yellow) that could work. 

Weights for my Veil

I got a tip about putting tiny weights on veil in case of winds.  I’ve heard of painting fishing weights white, or using crystal beads. 

Enclosed Wedding Ceremony Tent

I know that it is possible to get a tent with sides.  I guess that’s a safer bet than having an open one.  It would protect us from wind and rain. 

Photo Backdrop

The problem being of course, tents are ugly.  They do NOT take the place of blue skies and wide open, lush green outdoor spaces.  The only thing I can think of to dress up a tent is lots of candles (you can’t really light candles out in the sunlight, and I do love candles).  Actually, while we’re thinking about adding light, maybe some white Christmas lights would do the trick!  With some sheer fabric over them they’d look less harsh and Christmas-y and more elegant. 

Wedding Cake Refrigeration

It figures that I prefer wedding cakes with butter cream frosting, and they are totally NOT recommended for summer weddings.   On the other hand, I want a small wedding, and a small wedding cake, so I’m thinking it could go in the refrigerator until the reception. 

Climate Control

If it is really hot, apparently there are air conditioners designed for a tent (and for that matter, heaters for tents if it’s too cold).

It’s a lot to think about.  At this point, I’m almost wondering if I should skip the tent altogether and focus on finding a vacation home with an interior that’s already nice enough and large enough.  Why pay to heat or cool a tent when the house will have heat and AC?  This is silly now.  I can’t risk a muddy train on my dress and unless I’m renting a floor too, the tent won’t prevent that. 

Bridal Show: Andover Country Club

Tonight will go down as one of my most favorite bridal trade shows.  Not only did I win a couple raffles, but I got to bring Adam with me!  My fiancé was visiting from England this week and was willing to tag along.  I’m so glad we got to share this experience together just this once.  : ) 

I don’t if any of you readers have been to a bridal show before, but basically you go in and a bunch of vendors give you their business cards and promotional materials. Plus they feed you at them so I think it's fun. You get to sample caterers and wedding cakes. And to sweeten the deal almost every vendor runs a raffle.

A lot of the wedding expo raffles are lousy, like $200 off if you book a $2000 photography package, good for one night only (I'd won that before and had to turn it down). A lot of them are just sale prices that they give to everyone the next day anyway because we have to register with an Email address. (I have a separate Email account just for bridal info). But a few wedding vendors give actual take away gifts, like the florists might give away one of the bouquets they brought as a sample, some limo companies give away a bottle of Dom Perigon, and the grand prizes for the bridal show company is a complete honeymoon vacation package or cash (I won $200 cash once).

So when Adam and I were looking around at the wedding vendors I saw a woman selling bells and commented to Adam, "They're new; I know most of the vendors by now but never saw bells. My nana used to collect bells so they get me a little sentimental..." etc. I picked up one of the bells and there was a $35 price tag for a little 3 inch bell and I thought, "Huh, glad I have my wedding favors picked out, no way could I swing that." But I enter pretty much every raffle, so I put my ticket in that one too.

Well, the raffles started, and I won a $65 necklace from Lia Sophia, which was pretty cool.  And then they also called my name for the free bell.  Adam was totally my lucky charm tonight, hehe.

When I went up to claim my bell I thought, "Eh, okay, I get one of the little bells. Not as good as the $200 cash prize that time but a nice little token to remind me of nana." She walked off the stage area with me and told me this was her first show and she didn't have the bell, it's a bronze bell with a wooden handle, but she'd take my mailing info and send it to me. I said sure and I sat back down, wondering why she didn't just hand me one of the ones on the table but happy to do what she needed me to do if she was giving me a freebie. Then, ten minutes later she came back to our table and said, "Actually, if you don't like the bell, you can go on our website and pick one out of similar value." LUCKILY I didn't just smile and nod, thinking it was $35; instead I said, "What IS the value," and she said "$475." I said oh. Okay. Thanks. And when she walked away I said to Adam, "WHAT did she just say the value was?!"

He heard the same thing, and we looked on the website that night, and sure enough, there's a bronze bell with a wooden handle for $475, plus $30 shipping and handling.

So I’m now the proud owner of a $500 bell. And a good story behind it. The question is, how (or do I bother) do I incorporate a hand bell into my wedding?  The thing is LOUD.  I’m having about 15 guests, not 500 that need quieting down at some point.  Readers, any ideas?

Wedding Ceremony Planning

Once I looked at wedding coordinators, and the itinerary for my wedding day, I started thinking today about what exactly is involved in a wedding ceremony.  I mean, I know the basics, “We are gathered here together, blah, blah,” exchange rings and, “with this ring I thee wed,” “I Amber, take you Adam, in sickness and in health, to have and to hold, something, something, as long as we both shall live,” at some point we say “I do,” and then “you may kiss the bride.”  But I got to wondering about all those gaps that I don’t have memorized, and how much else there is to it.  Not that I want the ceremony to be long and boring, but I don’t want it to be over in 5 minutes.

I was in a friend's wedding before, but that day was a blur, to be honest.  Plus it was a Catholic wedding, so mine won’t be following exactly the same format.  So I searched around online for a basic outline of a ceremony.  And I got one here.  It explained everything, in order, but wasn’t simply a script.  Perfect.  So the next step was to find ideas for vows, readings, and so on.  Back to Google for ideas! 

Limited Time Offer if You're Interested in Monograms for Your Wedding

Update:

The Groupon deal below has ended.  But if you landed on this page looking for monograms for your wedding, another site that has them is The Wedding Channel Store.  I'm not really into the floor decals that are popular now (since my wedding will be outdoors and have no dancing, haha) but I really like the table signage:

I'd want a "script-ier" font, but I love the scroll work below the letters.  This one's going in the "wedding decor" file for later viewing!

.....

[Sorry, the offer in the original post below has ended.]


I don't usually like to do a limited time offer thing because I want my blog to stay relevant for readers.  But it might help someone, so why not?  I can always edit this post later.


I found a deal for wall decals on Groupon, and this company has a section on weddings.  They have monograms and cute romantic images a lot like ones I saw on a few popular wedding retail websites.  The Groupon is basically for $30 off.  You pay $20 and you get $50 worth.  They also have monograms that can go on votive candles and chairs if you rent them for an outdoor ceremony.


The coupon expires in about a day, so if you're reading this after Monday, March 14 you won't find it.  If you're here today though, here's the link to Groupon's deals for today.  You're looking for Dali Decals (the picture with all the funky circles).


I hope this helps someone! 

New England Bridal Show: Black Country Club, Georgetown, MA

I won!

If you’ve ever been to a bridal show expo, you’ll know that they always have raffles at the end of the night?  And usually they're crappy, like a discount, not an actual thing you get free and clear?

Well I won $200 cash!

A lot of the expos I go to are actually New England Bridal shows.  At the end of every one of their bridal shows they pull 5 names for people to win $200.  So mom and I were sitting there doing our usual thing as the lame raffles started.  I'd say "I didn't enter that, I don't want botox for free, never mind half off and I have to pay the other half," or "I didn't even want to put my name in that photographer's raffle cause his photos are terrible, but when he asked me outright I didn't want to tell him that, so if they call my name pretend it's not me."  Haha, I'm not ALL sour grapes, but I don't get my hopes up. 

And there was one that was $1000 off a venue (the country club we were at) so I said to mom that if they called me I'd have to pretend it wasn't me, because the place would be too big for me to use, so in good conscience I didn't want to take that $1000 from someone who really wanted to use the place: that's an AMAZING discount if you're going to book the place, it's just not for me."  So immediately after they pulled that name, they they announced they were doing the cash prizes next.   Mom said, "You wouldn't turn THAT down, now would you?"  And I said no, no I would not.  And she teased, "Even if someone else couldn't get it?"  And I said, "I'd just have to learn to live with the guilt."  And the guy announced "I'm going to butcher this last name..." and called me! 

A jolt went through me and I yelled, jumped up and ran up before they thought I wasn't there and called someone else, haha :D  CASH MONEY.  First one up!  Concidering all the little winnings I've accumulated, I figure if we put off this wedding another couple years I might be able to get the whole thing for free, haha.

The food at the Black Swan Country Club (with their on-site restaurant, Keon's) was good too.  It started out slow.  There was little veggies in a wonton that was boring.  Mom got something that looked like catfood but I missed it (till it came around again later and tasted like catfood.  But with mustard).  Then we saw a cheese and fruit spread, which was better than nothing but still disappointing.  Then we saw a little dessert table which was exciting, but, well, we were hoping for actual dinner stuff, hehe.  Well, finally we went in the other room and discovered the REAL food. 

I had prime rib (OMG YUM), shrimp, and grilled veggies.  It was all cold unfortunately, but the beef and veg were so tasty it didn't even matter.  And for dessert I got a small canoli, chocolate covered strawberry, and a little cup of chocolate mousse.  And when I say "cup," I mean "cup-shaped chocolate shell that contained chocolate mousse."  So yummy.  Then later they came around with mango chicken (a little dry but hey, this is all free, so I can deal) and this awesome little hors d’orves with blue cheese, cranberry, and walnut on a pastry.  I wish there were more of those!!  Oh, and a little crabcake.  So yeah, Keons was great.  It wasn't THE tastiest, compared to other bridal shows (Spinellis beats all) but it was a LOT of fun.  They had a nice variety of stuff, so I call that a successful show.  I mean, I ate so much that by the time we found the wedding cake I was too full to have a slice!  A crime, I know, but the canoli took priority. 

I never thought I'd actually win one of the grand prizes cause I'm not lucky that way.  But I guess after 2 years and all the shows I’ve attended I was bound to eventually.  And after the first show where I just didn’t really know the drill or what to expect at bridal shows, I always stay just in case (cause you have to be present at the end when they pull the names to win).  So brides to be, keep your eyes peeled for free bridal trade shows in your area because they are a lot of fun.

On Vacation: Auto-Update

I get to see my fiance twice per year.

This is one of those times.  *beams*

I've actually been here in England since July 10!  I'm setting this post to auto-update on a Friday during my trip, since I tend to post my wedding planning progress on Fridays.  If and when you DO read this post, thanks for being a loyal reader, and I'll be back to read and write blogs at the end of August!