Massachusetts Wedding Venue: The Stevens Estate, N. Andover

This evening’s bridal trade show at the Steven’s Estate in North Andover, MA was easy compared to my first New England bridal show.  I am a pretty shy person, now that I’m experienced and feel like I’m the one in control, I can definitely put on the confident act at the bridal trade show expos.  And what’s more confidence inspiring than looking forward to the day when the man you love commits the rest of his life to you?  So I look those bridal trade show vendors in the eye like, “bring it on.”  So what if I don’t have a  date set?  So what if I’ll only have 25 guests?  I’m the bride and that’s what I want so either make it happen or I’ll find someone who can!”

At least, I say that in my head.  Out loud it’s more like, “I see.  Thank you.”  ;) 

And as it happens, some of them do decide they’re not the one to “make it happen” for me.  I’ll never forget one photographer at a bridal trade show actually said “oh” and literally turned his back on me immediately.  That sort of thing would have been embarrassing and hurtful in the beginning, but now I can laugh about it.  And hey, if a vendor is doing so well that they don’t need my business, it’s all good.

This bridal trade show was different.  Much smaller, very few vendors, and less like a convention as it was in a historical home.  This wedding venue had a lot of what I’m looking for: pretty outdoor space for a ceremony.  Pretty, neutral, VERY traditional (old and expensive looking) inside.  Too expensive looking inside.  It was so rich it felt heavy.  All that wood paneling, the copper ceiling, I could feel the metaphoric weight added onto the knowledge that this place was going to be so far over my budget that I didn’t have to take it seriously.

Figures mom liked it and tried to talk me into it.

Of course, when I show her the differences in price between the place I like and this place it will be no contest for her.  She’s always about going as cheap as possible.  So I’ve learned from her that given the choice between two places I like about equally, I’ll be going for the cheaper one, be it venues, flowers, catering, whatever.  The cost for the Steven's Estate is about $3100 for the day (peak season on a weeknight, and I added in their ceremony fee to the figure) and that does not include catering, just grounds, tent, tables, chairs, and linens.  For that price I could rent a VERY nice vacation home for the week.

Besides price, another thing I didn’t like too much was the coordinator.  She was the stereotypical wedding planner: skinny, high energy, and loud with phony excitement.  She gave me a tour, showed me the bridal suite and said stuff like, “out there where you can’t see, that’s where you’d have your ceremony…”  It was all I could do to laugh that they were taking me on a tour and trying to sell me on the look of something I can’t see.  Maybe for nighttime bridal show expo tours a photograph of the grounds from that window could have helped?  She went on to say, “I will knock on your door and say…what’s your name again?” “Amber.” “'Amber are you ready to get married?' And you’d say, 'Just two more minutes,' and I’d go knock on Adam’s door and say, 'Adam, go ahead down, Amber’s ready for you,' and then I’d come back and say, 'Amber, don’t keep Adam waiting.'”

That seemed SO odd to me.  So she’s trying to sell me on this venue by telling me she will lie to my groom and then pressure me into hurrying up.  Wow.  I understand it’s good to stick to a schedule, but at least pretend to be sensitive to our needs?  That and the fact that she said we’d each have our suites for a couple of hours.  If I go with a vacation home I can have the rooms for a week.  No, this place didn’t feel warm and inviting to me.  Very ornate and picturesque, but not romantic and intimate.

Apparently I'm not the only one who thought so.  Here's a review from someone who got married there, who echoes my feeling. 

So I enjoyed the bridal show expo as though I was just out at a party with my mom, haha.  The food was fantastic.  I’m putting this caterer on my shortlist.  We had the most tender fillet, nice salad, a little pasta, one sample with a rich cream sauce and the other sample with a bold tasty tomato sauce, perfect non greasy spinach pie, a few other little appetizers, and chocolate mousse with berries.  All very nice.  I now have two caterers that I’ve met at different bridal show expo events who I’d be just as happy with, so I can let price decide.
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Massachusetts Wedding Venues: Vacation Home Rental

I looked at a number of Massachusetts wedding venues before I realized a vacation home would be the best option for me.  For my outdoor wedding I wanted a nice yard, with a decent interior in case the weather did not cooperate.  That is, one that is neutral and won’t clash with my wedding colors.  No wood paneling on the walls, no pink carpet, no blue anything.  And I really was kidding myself thinking that it didn’t matter if it was near the water.  I want it near the water!  I wanted it to look as nice as your typical Massachusetts wedding venues but be more scaled down to accommodate 25 guests, and have enough bedrooms for Adam’s family to stay the week on their trip to America.

Well, as I kept looking at places, I realized a few other things that were important to me.  I wanted a porch or deck.  It would be a perfect place to have a buffet set up.  And I wanted an open floor plan so that it felt open enough for all the guests.  A grand foyer would be ideal, but an open floor plan at least would work.  As for the yard, I didn’t want it to be close to neighbors.  That’s one advantage typical Massachusetts wedding venues have over your average yard: they’re nowhere near the road.  I’ll need something set back a bit.

At first I was looking at 2 bedroom homes.  Then reality hit me that for the number of visitors Adam had coming, it needs to be 3 or even 4 bedrooms, especially if I want to kick him out and make sure he doesn’t see me the morning of the wedding.

Well, I found THE most gorgeous house tonight [Edit: the direct link stopped working, but you can now scroll down a bit and it's the first listing].  It’s totally on par with your typical Massachusetts wedding venues.  It looks like an estate with a gorgeous garden, 5 bedrooms, all glass doors on the bottom, a pond, balconies galore a little swinging chair on the wrap around porch.  I mean, ENDLESS photo ops at this place.  I would not miss the luxury of a function hall at all here.  In fact, it’s so breathtakingly amazing I think it just might be worth it to cheap out on flowers if it means I can be in that amazing garden.  I can't WAIT to set a date; I'm so excited.  This is the house I want to marry Adam in!

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Considering Different Weddings Venues in Massachusetts

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At first I wasn’t really sure what sort of wedding I wanted. I know I want the white dress, the white cake, and the groom to be Adam.  But otherwise…not sure.  I wasn’t sure what’s out there in terms of small wedding venues in Massachusetts.  My mom and coworkers tried to talk me into getting married in England, so they’d have an excuse to visit.  But as beautiful as the countryside where Adam’s from is, there were two big reasons why I don’t think that’s best.  The first is that I don’t see how I could feasibly plan it.  I wouldn’t be able to see anything firsthand, or taste the food or cakes.  And dealing with all the currency conversion and exchange rates would make everything way more expensive.  But also I really want to stick with wedding venues in Massachusetts because I want Adam’s family to be able to come here and see Adam’s new home, and a little bit of the area where he’ll be living.

So once we decided on which country to get married in, I started to think about what sort of venue I wanted.  I didn’t want a church wedding because I’m just not a church goer and wouldn’t feel comfortable in one.  Since I want a small wedding venue for less than 20 guests, I wasn’t sure I wanted it in a huge reception hall like Spinellis, as beautiful as it is in there.  Other than a friend from college who did both of those things for her ceremony and reception, my only other wedding experience was outdoors.  I was just a kid, but I remember some uncle had their wedding in the backyard.  We all stood and watched the ceremony.  I don’t remember anything else.  Just that it was a nice warm sunny day.  I kind of like that idea.  I started thinking about different outdoor wedding venues in Massachusetts.

Someone at work had a beach wedding.  Nice sunny day, relaxing waves, salty air, and golden sand?  I do like that.  I’m certain there’s plenty of wedding venues in Massachusetts that are on the ocean.  But as much as I love the beach, I love to be in my bathing suit on the beach.  I didn’t think I’d like to be in an elegant wedding gown in the sand.  Plus seeing as how I used to work at the beach as a lifeguard, I decided I didn’t want to go that route for a wedding venue.  No, the backyard idea was more appealing for a small wedding venue.

The backyard I knew when I was a child would have been kind of pretty.  There was a nice lawn, with apple trees in the back, and tiger lilies all along the house.  Not bad.  The problem is, the trees are gone and a house was built on top of them.  There’s a lot LESS yard now than there was, since “our backyard” was actually the neighbor’s, she just let us play on it.  And she sold it.  So that wasn’t an option.  And my condo has no yard at all.

Mom told me that she got married in a park, not far from where I live.  That did sound very nice and pretty, but public.  No, I’d really rather a private, intimate ceremony at a small wedding venue without people gawking at us.  I knew Adam would like that even less, so I didn’t even ask.  No, I needed to give this some thought.  It needs to be small, but elegant.  But I just don’t know the first place to look for wedding venues in Massachusetts that are small enough to accommodate just immediate family and close friends.

Without a venue, it’s kind of hard to imagine what my wedding is going to look like.  Here I thought just finding Mr. Right is the hard part, hah.  Again, I decided it’s best not to get my hopes up envisioning something before I know how to make it a reality.  Maybe the bridal shows I register for will feature a few different wedding venues in Massachusetts. 
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Photo courtesy of:

Lincolnian (Brian)