Sunday, June 26, 2011

Coming up with the Ring Ceremony Wording

Next I looked for a vow to go with the wedding ring exchange.  You know, the, “with this ring i thee wed” vows.  This was almost as fun as looking for wedding vows.  I think the wedding vows are actually more important than the ring ceremony wording, because they are our commitment to each other, as opposed to being about an object (which is a symbol of, well, our commitment to each other). But that’s a good thing; it meant a little less pressure!

I found a wedding vow site here that had a good selection of ring ceremony wording.  I looked mainly in the secular/non denomination vows section.  I found myself drawn to the following sentiments:

o    The ring is a reminder of our wedding/vows
o    It’s a token of our love (duh)
o    It’s forever
o    It’s a sign of commitment
o    The ring has no end, like our love
o    Think of me as you wear it
o    Since you’ll always wear it, part of me will always be with you

I didn’t like:
o    One drew a comparison between precious love and precious metal.  That seemed a little gosh to me.  It’s true, but it seems tacky to bring up the money aspect in the vows!
o    The ring is symmetrical, symbolizing perfect love.  I don’t think perfection is a healthy goal to chase.  This is coming from a former perfectionist (who’s learned her lesson).

One of the simplest but very poignant vows was:  “With this ring, I wed you, and pledge you my love, now and forever.”  Unlike the marriage vows, which I wanted to be personal, I kind of liked how to the point and basic this ring ceremony wording is.  It’s a good contrast.  A nice way of saying, “Hey, it’s a wedding ring.  It’s a symbol of our marriage, period.”  That’s sort of all you need, really!

But in the end, my favorite was this:

“(Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my love. As it encircles your finger, may it remind you always that you are surrounded by my enduring love.”

Although I think I’d like to change it slightly to sound more traditional:

(Name), with this ring, I thee wed.  As it encircles your finger, may it remind you always that you are surrounded by my enduring love.

There is a “response” to this line, but that seems a little unnecessary to me.  I just like this ring ceremony wording because it’s pretty basic:  the ring is a symbol of our love.  And because I love tradition, I did want us to say the classic, “with this ring i thee wed” vows.” But I love the bit that says every time I look at it, I should remember that Adam loves me.  I do that with my engagement ring all the time.  When I need a little lift, I just gaze at it.  When it catches my eye at a random moment, it makes me smile inside.  Some people think the ring exchange is outdated, but for that reason, I think they’re awesome. 

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